Waiting Family Profiles

Home Location: Southeast MN

Family Status: Couple without children

Children in Home: None

Child Ethnicity: African American, Asian, Caucasian, East Indian, Hispanic/Latino, Native American

Hello!  We are Ben and Cody (and Dill and Winkie.)  We are a couple of queer farmers living in the beautiful bluff country of southeast Minnesota, who can’t wait to be Dads!

We both grew up in Wisconsin and met in college at UW Madison.  We have been together for 11 years and in that time we’ve lived all over the country, working on organic farms and developing our deep appreciation for nature and the outdoors.   When we don’t have our hands in the soil, we love hiking, camping, taking extended roadtrips whenever we find the time, and visiting our families and cherished group of close friends.

5 years ago, we settled here in SE Minnesota.  Ben now works as an organic farm inspector, and Cody is a seed farmer, growing vegetable and flower seeds for seed companies all over the country.  Ben is able to set his own schedule and works about 50% of the time from home, while Cody’s “office” is outside in his fields.   We feel very excited and privileged that our work will allow us both to be fully present in raising our future child.

Ever since we started thinking about having kids, we knew we wanted our family to grow through adoption.  We are strong believers in the idea of open adoption, as well as the idea that kids should know and understand who they are and where they came from.  As gay people we know all too well the consequences of social stigma on a child’s development and well-being.  We will do everything in our power to raise our child with all the love and support in the world, no matter who they are or what their story is.

We have been growing toward this moment for so many years and are beyond excited to share our life with a child. Long summer days outdoors, surrounded by green living things. Playing in the dirt, learning about flowers, eating a ripe melon right off the vine, falling down and stubbing your toe and getting right back up again.

Dill and Winkie – well to be honest they don’t really know what’s coming – but we know they’ll be just as excited as we are to watch our family grow.

In February 2020, after a decade of renting, we bought our first home.  It’s a big, old, 3 bedroom house that was completely updated before we moved in.  We quickly turned most of the yard into a giant garden, with lots of room for native prairie and wildflowers too.  After Dill came into our lives we fenced in the backyard and have turned it into a space where we can all sit around the firepit in the evening, listening to the birds and watching the sunset.

Cody is the youngest of 4 (with 3 older sisters) and is completely supported by his family in this adoption adventure.  Bob and Dede, his folks, live in a small town outside of Madison, WI.  While they’re already grandparents a few times over, they’re incredibly excited to welcome a new grandchild into their hearts.

Ben is the oldest of 3 (with 2 younger sisters).  Both sisters recently moved back to the midwest after many years away, so now everyone lives within 3-4 hours of each other, which makes Mom and Dad very happy.  And with no grandkids in the family yet, you can imagine how excited everyone is about us adopting!

Hopefully this gives you a sense of who we are and the kind of life we hope to give your child.  Your decision place your child for adoption is so deeply admirable, because it will allow someone else to have the family they dream of.  In the queer community there’s this notion of “chosen families.” It’s the idea that family isn’t just defined by blood – it’s who you choose to love, to support, and to care for, unconditionally through good times and bad.  This is one reason that for us, adoption feels so intuitive.  To that end, we enthusiastically welcome whatever level of openness you desire.

Thank you for reading our profile! Regardless of your decision, we are sending you lots of love!

 

One of our favorite activities is tent camping – here we are outside of Tucson, AZ in 2021.

 

 

Hiking in Badlands National Park, South Dakota

 

 

Dilly bean doesn’t always want to stay still for pictures!

 

 

Our family so far

 

 

Our main front garden – full of flowers and food.